Attention all super sleuths! Think you've got what it takes to snoop out the killer? Then try solving some of these five-minute mysteries!

THE CASE OF THE BLOODY MESSAGE
John Frankenheimer was bludgeoned to death in his apartment sometime during the night. His body was found by the landlord, Kevin Larren, at 2:30 in the morning after neighbors complained of the commotion, which means John was struggling with the murderer before he was killed. John's body is spread out on the floor of his living room. One hand is pointing to a picture of the landlord. The other hand is caked with blood and on the wall next to it, the phrase "Kevin Larren Killed Me" is written on the wall in blood, which the coroner matched with John's blood type. So who's responsible for John's death?
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ANSWER: It was his ex-girlfriend, Lauren, who killed him for cheating on her with his secretary! Ha, ha, I'll bet you thought it was Kevin the Landlord. Well, it's not! Ha, ha! Don't you look stupid!

THE CASE OF THE MISSING CAR KEYS
Damn, I can't find my car keys? Where did I put those pesky little keys?
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ANSWER: Oh, here they are. I left them in the dog's dish last night. Well, I'm off to the strip bar.

THE CASE OF THE STRANGLED CIRCUS CLOWN
Mitch Kobringer AKA Yanko the Clown was found by the circus's ringmaster, Carl Lindstrom, early this morning lying in his make-up chair with red marks around the middle of his neck indicating that he was strangled. Yanko was in full makeup wearing in his clown costume at the time of the killing. His room looks like the attacker ransacked everything except for the make-up table. His make-up kit, clown props and clown apparel are still intact.
Apparently, Yanko wasn't too popular behind the scenes with the other performers. Sven Traynor, the tightrope walker, was known for losing girlfriends to the randy clown. He owed at least five hundred dollars to Kimbo the Strongman over a bet. Brenda Bender, the contortionist in the sideshow, got pregnant once and aborted the child because of Yanko's constant threats. Who could the murderer be?
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ANSWER: Why, it's me, the narrator! I hate f***ing clowns! They've haunted my days and my dreams since I was six years old when my father built a bed that looked like a clown! Ever since then, clowns have been nothing but evil to me! God I hate them! I hate them so much! That's right, you might be able to lock me away but you'll never stop the evil clowns! They'll kill you all!